Scripture for Your Inner Outcasts

Transcript

"Her rival, to upset her, turned it into a constant reproach to her that the Lord had left her barren."

Welcome back to Scripture for Your Inner Outcasts. It's January 12th, 2026, Monday in the first week of Ordinary Time. Today we are joined by Bridget Adams, the member care coordinator for the Resilient Catholics Community. A lead writer and trainer on the PartsFinder Pro team and a retreat leader for Souls and Hearts.

"Her rival, to upset her, turned it into a constant reproach to her that the Lord had left her barren." In this passage from 1 Samuel, we see a dynamic that is very relatable. Peninnah intentionally torments her rival Hannah, the other wife of their husband Elkanah. And while polygamy isn't a part of our modern cultural experience, we can certainly all call to mind times in our lives where we were either being tormented by a rival, or when we ourselves were tormenting another person. Relationships are complicated, external relationships are complicated, and internal relationships are also complicated and complex. As we hear in this Scripture passage, Hannah responds in her body to the constant reproach of Peninnah through weeping and refusing to eat. It's likely that Hannah's exiled parts became flooded with shame, longing, anger, jealousy and despair in the relentless taunting about her infertility. Can you exiled parts relate with the sensation of a loss of appetite or a flooding of grief or tears? It's understandable and a part of our human condition to have exiles like you that can be so upset that their, your, powerful emotional experience takes over the whole self system. There is hope for you exiles with your powerful emotions and strong physical manifestations. A hope that your self system will be more and more self led, and that your innermost self will be able to recognize when you exiles are likely to be flooded, responding with overpowering responses internally, externally, or both. A hope that your innermost self will have a greater ability to anticipate and reach out to you exiled parts in moments of feeling tormented. Maybe, like Hannah, you exiles can relate to a feeling of being under a constant reproach. Does that ring a bell or sound familiar? For some of us, there's an internal voice, a part of us, that is nearly always reproaching us or, to be more specific, reproaching parts within our self system. This type of relentless inner criticism can be very activating for you exiled parts that hold the burden of shame or worthlessness or grief. You exiled parts know your barrenness or have a sense of ugliness or of your poverty. And when these beliefs are reinforced by tormenting, it may cause an overwhelm, as you sense that as being all of you. And your response may be very powerful and even debilitating for your self system. This experience creates another dynamic which fuels the protectors' needs to try to keep you exiles hidden and suppressed as they seek survival, safety and stability in relationships as best they can. Learning to trust that your innermost self can see you, can hear you, and desires to understand your experience and your responses, physical and emotional, with protectors' permission, is a step toward being more and more integrated into your self system. Although it might be hard to be patient as your system learns to be more self-led, the fruits of this type of inner harmony will be a blessing to the whole world.

If today's episode resonates with you, you'll likely benefit from reading two articles linked in the description below, all about navigating conflict and relating to our enemies.

Our Lady, our Mother, Untier of Knots, pray for us. Saint Joseph, pray for us. Saint John the Baptist, pray for us.